I’m Over the Apps. Can I Find Love the Old-Fashioned Way?

Photo-Illustration: The Cut; Images Getty Images

ENERGETIC BRUNETTE EDITOR, 34, seeks eligible, bright men, women, and nonbinary people to feature in hot, magnetic personal ads. Must have personality, open mind, and clean fingernails. I’m Amy Rose Spiegel, boss of The Cut’s brand-new Personals newsletter. Personals features stories about sex and love from readers, contributors, and some of our most interesting friends. With their help, I’ll investigate romantic mysteries like why everyone wants to get set up right now, the etiquette around unexpected after-dinner threesomes, and what it takes to hold on to someone worthwhile.

The newsletter also features you. I’m bringing back our personal ads to find you a hot date (or true and lasting romance, depending on what you’re in the mood for). If you have no idea what I’m talking about: “Strictly Personals” crammed New York’s back pages in the ’80s and ’90s. Singles anonymously wrote horny, hopeful communiqués about their tastes (“Dancing and Che Guevara,” one woman specified in 1984) and hatreds (“Small children,” per another). Interested readers got in touch through a mailbox. Because writers paid by the line, ads were brief. That, and the lack of photos, were their allure. Unlike other love-accession methods, you could imagine a fuller story from a few details. Never underestimate the power of romantic projection!

Personal ads don’t take much effort to put together. In four or five lines, with some degree of verve, you describe yourself and who you want. It’s like an app bio but more conversational, less nerve-racking. Some basic guidelines:

Do: Shoot straight and be sincere. Mention what you value and how you spend your time (free and on the clock). Lean specific and inviting: “I’m bad at surfing, but would love to get better together.” Or, “I want to stay up late, eat edibles, and watch infomercials with your head in my lap.” (I would go out with either person.)

Do not: Lie about facts like your height or job, but light embellishment is fine — you can affect an air of elegance even if your bed’s other tenants are a Reese’s wrapper, seven paperbacks, and two vibrators. (Ask me how I know.) Any romantic striver whose prose emits ChatGPT stink waves will be barred. This is about dating, not frenching the computer.

I’d love to hear from you, and I bet others would too. Whether or not you’re into want ads, each issue of the newsletter includes an original column, the best of The Cut’s past and present relationships coverage, and newsletter-only miniseries, like At My Finest, in which guest stars describe their sex appeal in their own words. (The first, which runs this weekend, is from the intelligent, magnetic Hari Nef.) Think of Personals like The Cut’s back room, where we’re leaning in close to hear every last louche detail. Subscribe below and I’ll save you a seat in our velvet conversation pit.

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